So last minute we entered a few things we had lying around the shop into the 100 Show. 4 of our pieces were selected and we ended up winning a Copper Ingot. No we didn’t win a small bird, you’re thinking of a Yellow Warbler. We made the same mistake and went to accept our prize holding a birdcage. Turns out it was a cube of copper. Embarrassing. Since we already bought the cage that’s where the Copper Ingot now lives. We change its water regularly and call it precious. One of our interns is trying to teach it to talk. Pretty trophy. Trophy want a cracker. Stuff like that.
I worked for The Man once… helped him win one them there copper ingots. Then he fired me ’cause I listened to Slayer real loud and called him out every time he tried to drop hints that he wanted to jelly his D up my A. I guess what I’m trying to say is this: cherish each and every moment with your ingot, as if it’s your last. Let it know you love it — tell it often. You never know if today might be the day it fucks itself right off a bridge or something.